Everyone dies one day, and that is an unavoidable fact. Eventually you will be released from the mortal confines of life, and what happens after is uncertain. While I may not necessarily believe in things such as the afterlife or heaven, I believe in honoring the dead. This ritual looks a little bit different everywhere, from sky burials to jazz funerals; everyone has limitless options for their post-mortem rager. Well, if you have money, that is.
In America, a large problem that is associated with funerals is their extremely high running cost. Assuming one is not cremated, the average cost of a funeral here is between $7,000 and $12,000. To say that is an exorbitant amount of money is a criminal understatement, given that the average American probably cannot cough up that amount at any given time. Not only that, but oftentimes deaths are unexpected. The price to grieve is becoming something that not many can afford, and the fact that this is a reality is truly abhorrent. Not to mention, the average cost of a funeral does not include the cost of a burial plot, headstone or flowers, let alone an obituary or the cost of transportation. Assuming that you budget as much as possible, get a simple headstone, minimal flowers, a grave plot and skip the obituary, you are still looking at well over a thousand dollars, likely multiple thousand. Having a nice funeral should not be exclusive to those linked to wealth. Funerals, in a sense, are a show of status, their lavishness often reflecting the wealth of those involved.
Cost aside, funerals are not a fun event. What do they offer that cannot be done elsewhere, in another way, at a different time? With the exception of specific religious/cultural rituals or seeing the body, what is the point? Oftentimes, these lavish and extravagant funerals are held at the expense of the bereaved planners who are burdened with insurmountable amounts of stress in an already traumatizing and tumultuous time of their life. Not to mention, seeing your loved one’s lifeless corpse looking all too peaceful, knowing this moment will be your last memory of them, is nothing short of gut-wrenching, something many will wish to forget for the rest of their lives. Let us not forget how difficult life is after losing a loved one: ignoring the high stress of last-minute travel to their funeral location, being forced to drop everything on top of that only exacerbates the distress that one may feel. However, the fact remains that all of this added stress will not bring back people from the dead, but only cause more turmoil for everyone involved.
Ultimately, the choice of funeral proceedings should be up to those who have passed on, or those who are able to make the decision for the deceased. Funerals are controversial proceedings for the living, a way of grieving and moving on. Funerals are not something that should be locked behind a paywall for those who have the funds. Not having funerals or opting for different ceremonies should be normalized, as not everyone needs a funeral. I believe that funerals are something that should only happen at the direct discretion of the dead, rather than an obligation that coerces grieving people into debt. A funeral is not the end all, be all; there are many ways in which we can honor the dead without our bank accounts going into the negatives.
