My personal reflection on 2020

Jael Ramirez, Opinion editor

2020 was by far, the worst and the best year of my life. I could say it was the worst, but then I would be ignoring all the great and exciting things I got to experience, and I could say it was the best, but then I would be ignoring all the pain and sad moments I went through. I grew and learned from my mistakes and experiences.

I started this year optimistic and ready to follow through my New Year’s resolutions: work out more, be more neat and be on top of my school work. I remember that I felt like I was in control of my life and ready to conquer the world. I think everyone feels like that at the beginning of the year. We’re all so full of hope and I think that’s a good thing, even if we don’t follow through with our New Year’s resolution. Quickly I learned my first lesson that year: your plans will be sidetracked and when you do, adapt. It’s unreasonable not to expect detours, stops and slippery roads throughout your journey called life. I wanted to stick to my plans and be as busy as possible but that didn’t happen. After some serious incidents, I started therapy around February. 

Suddenly, I was going to my therapist’s office two times a week for an hour or two when I could’ve been studying or doing anything but talk about my problems. I thought that I was weak if I went to therapy. That’s where I learned my second lesson: it is important to take care of yourself and it’s okay to get help. I learned to let myself accept help and when I did I was able to get the help I needed and get better mentally. I was diagnosed with depression and PTSD and was able to get a treatment plan. I learned to not be scared of being judged because I need some support, there are people around me that care about me and will never judge me or the struggles I go through.

Covid affected everyone, It was like the universe put our entire world on pause for a brief moment and all we were able to do was stay home and find ways to occupy ourselves. I spent a unhealthy amount of time watching Netflix and staying in my room. I was used to having a packed schedule to suddenly having all this free time to listen to my family argue every 5 minutes and my sister forcing me to play dolls with her. So I had a lot of time to look out the window and think. For example, I never realized how pretty my neighborhood is during the summer and especially now, that it is fall. I was so busy in my everyday life that I never thought to look around and appreciate everything around me. I took school and nature for granted. I ignored the birds chirpings every morning and complained about school everyday during Algebra class last year. So I know it sounds cheesy but my 3rd lesson is to appreciate what you have around you. You never know when it might go away. I should’ve appreciated being able to go outside everyday without risking myself of getting COVID-19 or being able to physically going to school everyday and interact with my friends and teachers. I miss that. On the bright side, I had time for lots of self reflection and I spent a lot more time with my dog. I redecorated my room and I catched up on sleep.

This year was hard for everyone, I lost contact with one of my closest friends and I was constantly put in very difficult situations this year. Despite all that, I’m still here and I’m grateful for that. A very important lesson I learned was to never give up and to always keep persevering. Life can be hard, I felt like giving up so many times and I think most people this year felt the same way. I noticed that most of us have remained hopeful and that amazing. We all have preserved through this year and I hope we all keep persevering. Our journey is not over yet.